I texted Lantern with my usual: "You up for something tonight? I could be over in an hour."

So I arrived at his place an hour later and we chatted about the latest issue of Ultimate Spiderman. (We're both comic book geeks...) Then he says, "I just got home from work, do you want me to take a shower first?" I like a little man-funk every now and then so I told him no. Then I proceeded to pull his pants down and swallow his pole to the pubes.

He loves it when I do that... I was really getting into the oral aspect of it all, which is something I don't usually do so I figured I should just go with what felt right. So I bounce is cock off my tonsils for a bit and then he lifts my head up and kisses me. Full tongue.

I enjoy kissing quite a bit but just so we're clear, its kind of like a handshake for me. Its hot, but it doesn't mean anything. Its just a kiss. The reason I mention the kiss at all is because it caught me off guard. Lantern doesn't kiss... he's always kind of an "assume the position" kind of guy. This change of gears was nice for a change.

Then he pushed me down on my back and fucked me hard for what seemed like an eternity. But he didn't cum. He pulls and tells me to suck him some more which, like a good bottom, I do. Then he starts fucking my throat... hard. Like balls slapping my chin hard.

"You want me to cum down your throat?"

I mumble a positive response due to the cock in my throat.

This goes on for quite a while but he's still not cumming. I'm thinking, "What the fuck?" Then he pulls out and he tells me that he doesn't think he's going to be able to cum because he's on some new medication. So we lay there and chat for a bit... and then he kisses me again.

So I decided to see if I could make him cum orally. He just kind of kicked back and I used every ounce of technique I could muster. Extra spit. Licking the slit. Massaging the head with my tongue.

I can feel his balls lift up and I know he's getting close, and then he starts cumming. Five really strong shots, which I swallow... careful not to waste a drop.

So while it wasn't a load in my ass, it was still a load. Not only that, but I got to work on my oral skills, and practice suppressing my gag reflex. All in all not a bad night; I did arrive to work with that "just been fucked" look and cum breath though...

This is done in preparation of a move to a new server, which rawTOP will be graciously providing me. Please bookmark the new URL as it will always point to the correct location for the blog, now and after the move.

Houston is an amazing city. Even though I live in the midwest, I've never been a country boy--I've always loved the skyline of a large city and the noise of people that comes with it. I'm hoping to move to Chicago in a couple of years.

I flew in, and met him. He was hotter than his photos which is always nice. About 6'4" tall, not thin but not fat he was just your average guy. Since I had arrived a little before check-in time, we grabbed a bite to eat and talked a bit. He's a really nice guy (which I had known from chatting with him) and by the end of lunch I was really horny to get his load in me.

We finished lunch and started driving to the hotel, and I started rubbing his cock through his jeans as we drove on the beltway. We checked in and got to the room... and I was in bed on my stomach shortly after.

We had each saved our loads for a week before meeting, so I knew he had a big one saved up for me. Even in the air conditioning, we fucked so hard that the sweat was dripping off of us. It was an interesting sensation, feeling the cool drops hitting my back as he fucked me. He shot in me, and I could tell it was a huge load by the wet feeling inside of me and then he just laid there, his cock still inside me as we drifted off to sleep.

We woke up an hour later, his cock pushing at my hole again and we went for round 2. Like Lantern, he had a ton of stamina. It was 9:30 at night before we realized that we hadn't left the room since we got there. Over the course of the next few days I got a total of 17 of his loads in me.

I had a blast down there, got away for a few days and while I didn't see much of the city, I did get used by a guy who knew how to fuck. I'd like to go back some day, maybe with a day or two spent in San Antonio as well... but this time I'd like to see just how many different guys I can to load me up during that time.

He was short, about 5'6" with a nice fat cock. I sucked him a bit, but he was already hard by the time I got there. He slid into me, thrust three times and blew his load.

Shortest fuck ever. I was in and out in about 10 minutes. I wish it had been longer, but I got what I was after.

I did get with Lantern again though. He called and wanted a quickie before he had to get to a family gathering. When I got over there, he was all business as he didn't have much time to kill. He said he was "sorry that we had to get right to it." I was fine with that. He dropped his pants and sat back while I assumed my place between his legs and went down on him.

I guess I should describe him a bit. Lantern is a 6'3" black guy with not a single ounce of fat on him, or muscle really but sticking out from his skinny frame is a fat 9" cock. Honestly the thing could pass as a third leg.

He started to fuck my throat, pushing my head down as he thrust upward. I've had more practice at suppressing my gag reflex with him than with any other guy I've known and he enjoys seeing just how far down I can go on his cock. Then he reached around behind me and pulled my shorts down and said he was going to fuck me bareback.

It only took him two weeks to get over his "safe only" kick.

I laid on his floor and assumed the position he likes me to be in, he laid on top of me and worked his way up inside of me with only spit as lube. He started of gentle, which was a little unusual for him but it was really nice... Our heads next to each other, his breath on my cheek as he whispered stuff to me while he fucked me. Driving himself deeper up my cunt as he thrust and then he wrapped his arm around my chest and pulled me closer to him. Very hot.

We stayed like that for quite a while and then he started fucking me harder and harder. He told me he was going to cum and I begged him to give me his seed.

After he bred me, he stayed in me for a bit. It takes him quite a while to go soft, and he whispered in my ear that he was sorry he had to pull out--that he didn't want to--but he needed to go.

While he was getting ready I hung around and talked to him. I laughed a bit because he actually washes his dick in his bathroom sink. So he's standing there, over the sink with a rag scrubbing the cum and ass juices off his junk...

I dropped him off at his family gathering and then I started looking for my next load.

There are some great quotes out there, one is from the show Queer as Folk (I know a lot of gays dislike the show for various reasons but there were some good lines): "Sex isn't safe. If it is, you're doing it wrong." Another comes from rawTOP: "People drive in cars and don't think twice about it, but public highways are one of the most dangerous places in the world. people speed, they drive when they're tired... it's all really dangerous. People skydive, people bungee jump off bridges... they do all these things because they make their lives more enjoyable. So why is the safe sex crowd think sex should be different than any other part of a person's life?"

I don't think of myself as a chaser, although a friend of mine equates being a chaser to being "a neg bottom that takes poz loads." I think it is a little more complex than that. Do I seek to become HIV positive? No. ...but I have accepted the fact that it will, inevitably happen. Call it an occupational hazard if you will. I'm okay with that.

Unlike many people who fear HIV, I do not. I sat down and became educated about the virus and realized that unlike a decade ago people who have HIV can live well into old age. In other words, it's no longer the death sentence it used to be. I'm not going to let a chance for really good sex pass me by just because someone has HIV.

Make no mistake though, just because I'm okay with contracting HIV doesn't mean that I'm seeking it out, or any other STD for that matter. I simply understand that there are possible consequences for my actions and I've accepted that I will have to deal with those consequences when the time comes.

Now I know that some of you are thinking, "What about the post titled 'Hot Chat'?" in which I said that I'd try to get a second load out of a guy if he told me he was poz as he was cumming in me. The way I see it is this: If you've just taken a poz load, the deed is done. You might as well enjoy the ride, so yes, I'd try and get a second load out of him. I'm a gay man, not a woman; no sense in being a pussy about things.

Quite possibly the biggest reason that I bareback though is simply because I enjoy it. Now that I'm entering into full stride I'm having more fun than I can remember having in my life. I've let go of my inhibitions and told the nagging little voices that everyone has to shut the fuck up. I'm living completely in the now with no regrets for the past and no doubts about the future. It's extremely freeing.

Because I'm a bigger guy, I don't have a lot of the hang ups that many other guys have. Sure I'm more attracted to some guys that others, but I realize that just because a guy doesn't looks like a model doesn't mean that he can't fuck like a total stud. That alone has lead me to a lot of great sex that I might not have had otherwise.

All of those reasons are why I bareback.

Assuming he can get a party together, my Friday night could be very hot.

So I went to booth 13 and dropped some bills into the slot and sat back and waited. I love the little booths there. When you put money in, the little "in use" light comes on out front. It's like an advertisement of sorts. Guys who wander will come in and peek in your door.

A few guys checked and weren't interested. Then an older gentleman came in and unzipped. I dropped to my knees and began servicing his cock. It was average in length but pretty thick. He wasn't interested in fucking, but I was just happy to be of service. He started to fuck my face a bit and then I felt his dick orgasm but no cum actually shot out...

Cheater! LOL

He was a really nice guy. He kissed my neck and thanked me before he leaving the booth. I checked my cell phone and realized I had to go or I'd be late for my second fuck date of the night.

After a bit of coordination to find the guy's place, I entered his apartment. He let me in and then sat down on the couch and started flipping channels on the TV. While odd, I thought maybe he was just shy. So I sat down next to him and started chatting about the show that was on. Still nothing. It was like he got me into his apartment and wasn't sure what to do with me. 

Maybe I should get a tattoo on my left ass cheek that says "Insert Cock A into Hole B."

Anyway, I finally asked him where we should do this and that set him into action... briefly. We went to his room where he took his shirt off and then laid on the bed. ...and stayed there. No hint at what he wanted me to do at all, since his shorts were still on and they weren't the kind with a fly that I could unzip.

The rest of the time that I was there was spent this way. I don't know if he was tired or what exactly but it was the worst fuck date I've ever had. He couldn't stay hard, wasn't into it at all and needed constant prodding. Bleh.

I finally got fed up and just left.

The problem was that I hadn't cum yet. I had specifically tried to not cum with Lantern because I wanted to last through the whole evening. Guess the joke was on me. :(

He didn't have to ask me twice.

I picked Lantern up and we went to the hotel where our out-of-town friend was staying, only to have him say that he couldn't partake because he had a friend coming soon and couldn't afford to be found out. So Lantern and I ended up back at his place.

He plopped onto the couch with his cock hanging out with this look on his face that said, "Well? Get to it." I was down on my knees in seconds, swallowing his 9" pole to the hilt. This lasted for about 15 minutes.

"You want me to fuck you?"

I looked at him and smirked. "Why are you asking me?"

He stood up and pushed me down onto the floor. I was rock hard at this point, my uncut cock leaking precum all over. Then I heard the sound of a condom wrapper and my heart sank a bit.

"You're sure there's no way I can talk you out of using that?"

Lantern had a bit of an STD scare and now he's on a safe sex kick. I give it a month tops before he's back to fucking raw. Unfortunately he couldn't be dissuaded, but I wasn't going to let that ruin a perfectly good fuck.

He spread my legs and spit on my hole before sliding all nine inches of black fuck-stick into me. I moaned immediately and he started pumping slowly. He knew he tore me up a bit last time and he was trying not to hurt me again. As he pushed all the way into me, I arched my back bringing my head up beside his. I could feel his breath on my cheek as he fucked me, alternating between hard and soft.

"Who's the biggest you've ever had in you?"

"You are."

At one point, I felt my cock twitch and I almost shot my load. He's a total stud with a ton of stamina and he lasted a solid hour before he plunged into my ass and yelled "Fuck, I'm cumming!"

He wants a repeat Sunday.

Thing is, I love the way he fucks. He knows just what buttons to push and he can last quite a while... he can also cum 2-3 times before he's done if he's got enough time. But the condom really bothered me for some reason. It denies a lot of the sensation and I could feel the condom shifting around on his cock more than I could feel his cock inside of me. It was a bit distracting at times...

I'll just have to charm the condom off of him next time.

He had always played with drugs, but he had fallen into his addictions by this point. Nothing out of control but enough that you could tell when he hadn't had a fix. His parents' homophobia was playing heavily on him and  for the first time in our roughly seven years together he began to question his sexuality... to question us.

When the divorce finalized, his father decided to move out of the area and Scout was going to go with him. I clung to him. I didn't want to let him go. He had been my best friend growing up and he had been my lover. We'd experienced so many firsts together and it broke my heart to think that it would end.

Two days before his move, we got together again. He had inhabited the largest bedroom on the upper floor now with a king sized bed. He bent me over the bed frame and slid into me and we fucked. It was different though. He was more gentle than I remember him being at any other time. We kissed, which we had done before but it wasn't something that we did a lot of.

On the day before his move, he called me and asked me to come over for a repeat. I wanted to but I couldn't. I couldn't go there, and know that it would be the last time. I think I made some excuse about having to work and I think he knew I was lying. He moved away and I never heard from him again.

I loved him and I still do to this day. Part of me wishes I could go back, and convince him to have stayed... or that I could have gone with him. I was pretty well destroyed from the experience. His confusion at the end hurt me on a level that few others have been able to reach and I blamed myself for that. I kept thinking that if we hadn't lost our virginity together, hadn't known each other or loved each other that maybe he could have grown up straight and had a better life. I closed myself off to people to avoid any risk of pain and I ate. For two years I ate.

Two years later, I met two people who took the time to break through the defenses I had set in place and slowly, I began to realize that Scout's state of mind hadn't been my fault... that we were both just kids and had been in a poor situation. I also realized that we got to experience something really amazing and slowly I began to get my life back in order.

I'm still working the weight off today, but I'm making steady progress. I found out a couple of years later that Scout had moved back into the area. He still never contacted me, and I was fine with that. I don't know if he ever went back to guys or if he found a woman that he could love but I knew that he was okay and still is.

...and that's enough for me.

Of course we did fall asleep... but we didn't get found out luckily. It wouldn't have gone over well for him if we had--his parents were notorious homophobes and it was something that they tried to instill in their children...

One particular time comes to mind: It was the summer between our sophomore and junior years of high school. As usual, Scout and I were playing the sleep over game so that we could fuck. He had come over, and no sooner had he gotten in the door than he had my pants around my ankles and was breeding me on the stairs leading down to our basement.

My mother was making dinner, not fifteen feet away with only a sliding door separating us. No lock. Not even a door knob. We were a mess of hushed moans as he thrust himself deeper and deeper into my cunt. He bit down on my shoulder and pushed deep, and I could feel his cock twitching inside me... filling me with the warm wet sensation, leaving his load up in me; the first of several that night.

The thing about Scout is, I always loved the way he fucked with a wild abandon... it was like each fuck would be the last one and we wouldn't see each other again for a long time. We were kids, we were in heat and we gave everything we had to each other. We'd go from playing Super Nintendo to fucking and then back to Super Nintendo... with a load simmering inside me. It also didn't hurt that he'd literally spray, not shoot, cum when he got off.

I picked him up from work and we ended up back at his place. We started off by seeing just how far down my throat he could get and before long he was invoking my gag reflex. Now I realize that it's a natural reflex... but I really need to work on that. Anyway, he didn't mind since he was literally going deeper than he was used to. But that was only the start of a two hour fuck.

He told me to get down on the floor and slid right in me. No condom. No lube. No spit. Just cock in hole. Man did it feel good. We alternated between him fucking me and me blowing him for the remainder of the session until he blew in my mouth.

While I was really hoping to get some cum in my ass, it was still a lot of fun. It also ended a four month dry spell. We sat there and talked for a bit afterward. Turns out he's a bit of a comic book geek too. For that reason, we'll call him Lantern.

What's more, he wants to see me again. Next time I'm going to make him use lube though. My ass is still sore today, 4 days later. My poor abused ass.

Chatted with this guy a bit on gay.com, we'll call him Farmer Brown. Made it very clear I wanted to get bred, and he said he'd drop a load in my ass... but when the time came he just couldn't get it hard enough to get in my ass so I had to settle for getting his load down my throat.

He kept offering to use a dildo on me while I sucked him, but let's be perfectly honest: If a bareback bottom is looking to get cum up his ass, a dildo just isn't good enough. Especially when you've promised "no pull outs."

In retrospect, cum is cum and it's not that I don't enjoy getting it down my throat but I was definitely looking to get it up my ass. Also, in retrospect, getting in my ass might not have been such a good idea since I'm still pretty sore from getting fucked last Saturday...

That post is coming soon.